October's Support Group topic

Conflict Resolution

Whether you are navigating a tantrum with a 3-year-old, negotiating a curfew with your teen or discussing holiday plans with your partner, conflict is an inevitable part of relationship.  Discover a few conflict resolution techniques below and consider how you might apply these strategies in your day-to-day as foster parents.

Doctor examining child's throat in clinic
conflictresoluton
Image from https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/conflict-resolution-strategies

Conflict Resolution

While this infographic is geared towards the workplace it is helpful when we assess the goals of our interactions with others particularly with your foster children.

Is the goal to have your foster child make straight As?

or is the goal to build a trusting relationship with your child where they feel safe to “fail” and encouraged to try again?

As Ross Wright says, “We never want to sacrifice relationship on the altar of accountability”. Similarly, when we navigate conflict with our foster children the importance of the relationship must out weight the importance of the goal. that doesn’t mean we never accomplish our goals but we never prioritize being right and winning an argument over connecting in relationship and seeking to create avenues of success for them.

Teaching Children Conflict Resolution Techniques

  1. Classroom Conflict Resolution Techniques
    • This helpful resource gear towards the classroom but translate well to sibling relationship dynamics at home. Check out their 6 steps that can help to:
      • De-escalate emotions
      • Refrain from the blame game
      • Empower children with communicative skills
      • Autonomize the conflict resolution process 
  2. Helping Foster Children Resolve Conflict
    • A similar resource to “Classroom Conflict Resolution Techniques” but with a more sensitive lens to children in foster care. The article provides collaborative, forward thinking solutions to promote emotional intelligence in your child. 

The Goal is Connection

Here is a short video on how understanding our end goal in conflict can be the catalyst for its’ success. If our goal is only to solve the problem, we may end up sacrificing the relationship with the person.

As a foster parent no conflict is worth winning at the price of your established trust with your foster child.